All right. So, did I ever tell you how Carolina and I met?
[Well, doesn't matter if he did or not. Strap in, Micchy, we're careening down Schmoop Avenue.]
I was out one night with some buddies--guys from Basic, not even part of my team anymore, but I thought we all just wanted to have a good time--and they abandoned me. They left me at this ridiculous nightclub--Errera. That was the name of the club. All glitzy, neon lights and fruity alcohol. You know the kind of place. Not your typical military bar, you know? We figured it'd be fun, try to pick up women who didn't know better before our reassignments.
But anyway. So they left me there, and I was bored out of my mind at the bar, and...All right, get this. The joint had these customized lighters they were handing out for free, you know, like the pens doctors have with the names of drugs written on them except made for the club. So I was sitting there, barely even buzzed yet, flicking this lighter on and off wondering where my friends went off to, when out of nowhere this girl just walks up, just grabs the lighter right out of my hand. And I turn around, and she's--
[He stops for a moment, caught up in the memory, breath held.]
You have to understand, Micchy, she's...I don't know if you two've met, but Carolina's...she's the most beautiful woman alive. You look at her and it's like how pretty fire is before you realize your house is burning, she's all strength and swagger and danger under that smile. Like a lioness, that kind of grace and power. You realize you're blessed if she likes you and it's no less terrifying that she does. And her eyes, they're like nothing else, they're this green I never seen anywhere else, like they're burning, too. Burning with life. [His voice loses a little of that hushed quality, picks up a little more humor.] And she's wearing black boots and this little blue number that's ruffled and sweepy in the back, but shows every inch of those gorgeous goddamn legs...
[He relishes that image for a while. Carolina in youth. Carolina before the war. Not that Carolina now is any less of a goddess; he treasures them both, that strangely innocent confidence and the different strength she built without him.]
Anyway, I'm staring at her, and she swipes the lighter out of my hand, and she says, she says--[Incredulous fondness and not a little laughter bleeds into the edge of his voice.]--"Might wanna be careful with that, it's hot enough in here already with you around."
[His voice follows the cadence of her speech like a well-worn groove, York knows it so well. Fits it so comfortably.]
Didn't matter anything she said after that. I knew right then I woulda followed her anywhere.
[The way he's talking about her... it's how people are supposed to talk about the people they like, isn't it? It's nice, and it's gentle, and it's free of the possessiveness he'd ever had when talking about Mai. He ignores the phantom for the moment, just listening to the words, and...]
I haven't met her, no. I guess... the person I did this for... all of what I did... I wanted her to follow me. The way you talk about the person you love... it's different. I wish I'd been able to have that kind of relationship, instead of...
[There's a quiet sniff, and he clears his throat.]
... Are you... happy with her? You don't... I mean, I guess you don't have to answer that, relationships are complicated...
But you're right. Relationships are complicated. The way we left things the last time we spoke before meeting again here...let's put it this way. She kicked me to the top of an elevator shaft in a spaceship crashing to land and I never saw her again.
[He's quiet for a few moments, shaking his head even though York can't see.]
The last time I saw Mai... the last time I saw her alive, at least... was when I left her with Sengoku and went off to kill Kouta. When I got back... he'd operated on her, taken the Forbidden Fruit out, and she was dead. She appeared to me, but she'd... changed. She wasn't human anymore.
All because I was too stupid to think that he wouldn't hurt her to get what he wanted.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
[Audio]
He sounds like a good guy. Your brother.
Check in. How are we doing. He still there? If he is, I can take a turn talking, I don't mind.
[Audio]
[He's quiet for a few long moments.]
I think... better. He shut up when I was talking. I think... maybe you should talk now, though.
[Audio] Jumps off over Freelancer Headcanon Canyon. Headcanyon, if you will.
[Well, doesn't matter if he did or not. Strap in, Micchy, we're careening down Schmoop Avenue.]
I was out one night with some buddies--guys from Basic, not even part of my team anymore, but I thought we all just wanted to have a good time--and they abandoned me. They left me at this ridiculous nightclub--Errera. That was the name of the club. All glitzy, neon lights and fruity alcohol. You know the kind of place. Not your typical military bar, you know? We figured it'd be fun, try to pick up women who didn't know better before our reassignments.
But anyway. So they left me there, and I was bored out of my mind at the bar, and...All right, get this. The joint had these customized lighters they were handing out for free, you know, like the pens doctors have with the names of drugs written on them except made for the club. So I was sitting there, barely even buzzed yet, flicking this lighter on and off wondering where my friends went off to, when out of nowhere this girl just walks up, just grabs the lighter right out of my hand. And I turn around, and she's--
[He stops for a moment, caught up in the memory, breath held.]
You have to understand, Micchy, she's...I don't know if you two've met, but Carolina's...she's the most beautiful woman alive. You look at her and it's like how pretty fire is before you realize your house is burning, she's all strength and swagger and danger under that smile. Like a lioness, that kind of grace and power. You realize you're blessed if she likes you and it's no less terrifying that she does. And her eyes, they're like nothing else, they're this green I never seen anywhere else, like they're burning, too. Burning with life. [His voice loses a little of that hushed quality, picks up a little more humor.] And she's wearing black boots and this little blue number that's ruffled and sweepy in the back, but shows every inch of those gorgeous goddamn legs...
[He relishes that image for a while. Carolina in youth. Carolina before the war. Not that Carolina now is any less of a goddess; he treasures them both, that strangely innocent confidence and the different strength she built without him.]
Anyway, I'm staring at her, and she swipes the lighter out of my hand, and she says, she says--[Incredulous fondness and not a little laughter bleeds into the edge of his voice.]--"Might wanna be careful with that, it's hot enough in here already with you around."
[His voice follows the cadence of her speech like a well-worn groove, York knows it so well. Fits it so comfortably.]
Didn't matter anything she said after that. I knew right then I woulda followed her anywhere.
[Audio]
[The way he's talking about her... it's how people are supposed to talk about the people they like, isn't it? It's nice, and it's gentle, and it's free of the possessiveness he'd ever had when talking about Mai. He ignores the phantom for the moment, just listening to the words, and...]
I haven't met her, no. I guess... the person I did this for... all of what I did... I wanted her to follow me. The way you talk about the person you love... it's different. I wish I'd been able to have that kind of relationship, instead of...
[There's a quiet sniff, and he clears his throat.]
... Are you... happy with her? You don't... I mean, I guess you don't have to answer that, relationships are complicated...
[Audio]
But you're right. Relationships are complicated. The way we left things the last time we spoke before meeting again here...let's put it this way. She kicked me to the top of an elevator shaft in a spaceship crashing to land and I never saw her again.
[Audio]
[He's quiet for a few moments, shaking his head even though York can't see.]
The last time I saw Mai... the last time I saw her alive, at least... was when I left her with Sengoku and went off to kill Kouta. When I got back... he'd operated on her, taken the Forbidden Fruit out, and she was dead. She appeared to me, but she'd... changed. She wasn't human anymore.
All because I was too stupid to think that he wouldn't hurt her to get what he wanted.
[Audio]
...
Turned out she saved herself, in the end. And I'm proud of her, but I still wish...you know. So you're not alone in that boat.
[Audio]
[He's quiet for a few breaths, a soft 'Vul?' from his side of the line.]
I think... maybe I can sleep now. Or try to, at least. ... Thank you, York-san.
[Audio]