.004 Δ [Video]

[ratherbelocky]

Goooood evening, residents of Johto. It's a lovely, drizzly January day, and I've got a question you folks might be able to answer for me. Consider it an informal poll.

[York looks comfortable and cozy as he lounges around his house, still wearing his ugly Christmas sweater.]

Now, I understand that this place just isn't equipped to support a Grifball League, but there's got to be more to life than just hockey and baseball. Are there Pokémon Olympics or something I should tune into? And, hey, what kind of sports did you guys have back in your worlds? Were they fun? Would you recreate 'em here if you could?

[He rubs his chin for a moment, then adds:]

If anyone around Goldenrod's interested in forming some kind of low-key community sports team--y'know, something for people, not Pokémon--let me know. I might be able to help us get something set up before baseball season starts.

Comments

[bent_the_world]

I don't know exactly what the Olympics are, but some friends and I are trying to get some Pokemon sporting competitions going! Since...there don't seem to be any.

Back home we had pro-bending! I played professionally for a while. It's awesome! But I'm not sure how to recreate it here. There's no bending here...

Uh, controlling elements. It's a thing where I come from.

[ratherbelocky]

[Controlling elements? Okay, hold on, he'll try to puzzle that out on his own for a minute while he explains Korra a thing.]

The Olympics are an international sports event held back on my Earth. Every four years, participating countries send a huge team in to compete in a whole bunch of different sports: team sports, gymnastics, martial arts, all kinds of different races. The hosting city changes every time and it's a huge deal. People train their whole lives for it.

[He scratches his temple, then laughs and admits:]

Okay, I still don't get exactly what you mean by pro-bending or controlling elements. Something like what Pokémon do?

[bent_the_world]

That sounds really awesome, actually!

Bending is a thing where I come from, some people are born with the ability to control and manipulate an element. Pro-bending makes it into a sport. There's two teams in an arena that's raised and surrounded by water. There's an earthbender, a waterbender, and a firebender on each team. The goal is to try and push the other team back with bending moves until they've been knocked out of the arena.

It's a pretty huge deal.

[ratherbelocky]

Ohh, hey, yeah, that does sound pretty cool. We wouldn't have anything like that where I'm from, though I guess it sorta sounds like a...magical sumo wrestling match. But with teams. I bet you could drum something up using Pokémon instead, but then it'd have to be for them, not for humans.

text;

[doitrockapella]

A regionwide Olympics — now there's a winning idea. So much of Johto and Kanto revolves around the athletic merits of Pokemon; it'd be nice to see some celebration of their trainers' accomplishments more often, too.

[Carmen, you just want to steal the damn Olympics. Be real.]

My Porygon2 tells me you're a close friend of his. York York York, is it? What a pleasure.

text;

[ratherbelocky]

Oh, hey, you're Zack's trainer! Yeah, I love that little guy. You must be

[...]

You know, I don't think he ever let your name slip. Looks like you've got me at a conversational disadvantage.

text;

[doitrockapella]

No need to hold that against your impression of Zack's manners; we've had a few discussions about giving out personal information on the network. Safety first.

But that's fine; I like making my own introductions almost as much as I like having my reputation precede me. I'm Carmen Sandiego.

[Enjoy that, York; feel free to fourth-wall the shit out of her if you see fit.]

Video

[veggie_vamp]

My boyfriend plays Casketball, and I've been on the Skultimate Roller Maze team! I event went to the championship!

Video

[ratherbelocky]

Casketball I can sort of figure out, but what's..."Skultimate Roller Maze?" It sounds awesome, whatever it is.

Video

[veggie_vamp]

It totes is! See, you rollerskate on teams through obstacle courses, and the obstacles change every time you race! Pitfalls, swinging blades, hallways in the dark, anything! As long as one person from your team makes it to the finish line first, you win!

text;

[grapeeater]

There's dance teams where I'm from - or there used to be, at least. They got pretty competitive.

text;

[ratherbelocky]

Like. Ballroom dancing?

text;

[grapeeater]

No, though I know how to do that too. More like modern pop music sort of dancing.

[Video]

[ojamameansfamily]

Where I'm from we had Duel Monsters. A REAL sport, not like driftball or whatever the hell that is.

[It's totally a sport because shut up.]

This place is so backwater no one's even heard of it, so YEAH I'm gonna recreate it if I can.

[He just needs to build up some real funds first. And get a printing press. ...Duel Disks might be a little beyond his ability, but he'll burn that bridge when he gets to it.]

[Video]

[ratherbelocky]

Oh-kay, I'll bite. What's Duel Monsters, and how's it any different from what we do with our Pokémon?

[Oh god York what can of worms are you opening.]

Re: [Video]

[ojamameansfamily]

It's totally different! See, that's what I mean when I say this place is the freaking boonies!

[Yeah this is basically a whole Pandora's box of worms, York. Sorry not sorry.]

First off, we play it using cards. The monsters're all holographic, and there's no freakin' slime involved unless you're playing some really sick exhibition duel.

[He pulls a small deck of trading cards from his pocket and waves it at the camera as he rants. A more elegant battling method from a more civilized dimension, obviously.]

You summon monsters and make them battle until someone's life hits zero. It's all strategy and power, none of this 'make friends with your monsters' crap.

[And he's definitely not lying at all about that last part.]

[Video]

[wing_attack]

Basketball, baseball, football - uh, American football, not soccer, though we had that too - volleyball... you get th epicture. I know Andalites have something called 'driftball' which Ax explained to me once and I think it sounds like basketball but in low-gravity? I know Hork-Bajir don't really have sports, and I doubt Yeerks do either and I don't think I'd want to know about them if they did.

And the the Skrit Na pretty much just make a sport out of kidnapping humans and other species and flying around with them or putting them into zoos.

[Video]

[ratherbelocky]

[Okay, he probably could have made comments on low-grav basketball and what a bad and thus amazing idea that's been in his experience, but the last thing gets him right in a sore spot.]

There a lot of 'em, these Skrit Na? They get away with that often?

[Video]

[wing_attack]

Uh... I don't know. You - well I don't know how it is in your world, but a lot of those stories from my world about being abducted by aliens in big fat disc-shaped UFOs? Skrit Na.

From what I hear they're pretty scattered, though.

Action;

[usedlightscreen]

[North is sitting on the couch just out of frame and he looks up and gives York an amused look, watching his boyfriend vlog about sports to the network.]

It's hard to believe that it's really been about 15 years since I did track.

Action;

[ratherbelocky]

[York groans and repositions himself so he can sling his legs over North's lap. Welcome aboard the casual affection train, there is never any ending this ride.]

Dude, don't say it like that. You're gonna make us sound old.

Action;

[usedlightscreen]

[North smooths his big hand over York's pajama pants, then his grin turns a little more sly as he traces York's ankle at the edge of them.]

Mm, I prefer the term "experienced".

[video]

[solas_ion]

What the heck's a Grifball?

[video]

[ratherbelocky]

Do you like explosions?

[video]

[solas_ion]

Yes.