even after that i didn't let rachel go and kill her. she wanted to and i never really told her all of what happened.
and then she showed up again and i thought she'd changed and then she tried to kill us and some of her people that were trying to find a more peaceful solution and i still don't know if she died in that. i think she did but i'm not sure.
i'm not like cassie who's hurt by every single yeerk we killed but i understand that they were doing what they thought was needed and we did the same. i understand kill or be killed but i couldn't even let someone kill the person who tortured me. even if we had killed the yeerk without killing the host she'd still volunteered to be infested. she was the enemy and she's still hurting me even now with everything that she did and i still don't know if she should have died or not. she should have but i can't convince myself.
i don't know. sometimes i hate being human again i miss not having to really think.
[Text] Some spoilers for later in the series
and then she showed up again and i thought she'd changed and then she tried to kill us and some of her people that were trying to find a more peaceful solution and i still don't know if she died in that. i think she did but i'm not sure.
i'm not like cassie who's hurt by every single yeerk we killed but i understand that they were doing what they thought was needed and we did the same. i understand kill or be killed but i couldn't even let someone kill the person who tortured me. even if we had killed the yeerk without killing the host she'd still volunteered to be infested. she was the enemy and she's still hurting me even now with everything that she did and i still don't know if she should have died or not. she should have but i can't convince myself.
i don't know. sometimes i hate being human again i miss not having to really think.